Wednesday, April 04, 2007
We didn't make it.
I have this confidence in me when we were all on stage.
Things were looking good and stuff.
But when the music started.
Things started to get haywire.
Ying zhun was very bad.
And there were flops here and there.
And so...
We got a gold.
A GOLD.
What can I say?
My life still goes on.
It has to go on.
I probably have to act as if nothing happened today and go to sch tmr for my Projects Day.
I feel dissapointed.
Sad.
I have let my seniors down.
The seniors who acheived for us a gold with honours.
I dun think I have any more face to face them.
We dropped.
We dropped out of the honours.
We were the ONLY one who did not mantain the honours.
And so, I dun even dare to face people from DHSCO, CHSCO, NYCO, RVCO, PRCO.
I finally realised why people want to be left alone when despressed.
How I wish I can just.. just.. get over it.
but I can't.
I can't face the fact that we got a GOLD.
Our seniors mentioned that we couldn't make it.
I didn't believe it.
But reality proved them right.
We were not up to standard.
The whole orchestra seemed depressed.
Guan Chye was putting on a brave front, but everyone knows hes dissapointed.
Justin too.
Everyone was trying to act normal.
But who isn't sad?
Yet what can we do?
We can't go back in time.
Now I can only hope that this GOLD will wake all of them up.
WAKE UP PLEASE.
STOP SLACKING AND STOP BEING UNCOOPERATIVE.
YOU THINK GOLD WITH HONOURS IS SO EASY TO GET?
YOU THINK THAT JUST BECAUSE OUR SENIORS GOT IT FOR LAST TIME WE CAN DO IT AGAIN?
Wake up please.
You guys have to go for SYF 2 years later AGAIN.
Use this gold as a lesson, and get back our honours 2 years later.
With double power and effort.
We have let our school down.
We have let our seniors down.
We have let our conductor down.
We have let our instructors down
We have let our teachers-in-charge down.
We have let our friends down.
We have let ourselves down.
How I wish I can just take out a knife and kill myself right now.
Right now.
Kill me.